I think my head just burst into flames, I'm so angry and frustrated. See, this is why I avoid going to doctors - aside from our family physician, who's great - because so many of them have such huge egos I'm surprised they fit through doors without temporarily deflating their heads. Paul nags at me to see specialists when I have pain or trouble with something, but appointments like today's are the precise reason I wait so long, hoping things will just go away on their own.
I went to see an orthopedic specialist today. He spent all of about five minutes with me, hardly asked me anything, and treated me as though I were an idiot. He barely listened to me. I guess he makes too much money to sit around with me when he could be on to the next patient, making more money.
His recommendation went something like: Oh, it's not an emergency. Just give us a call and let us know when you want to do it. We'll go in and clean up your knee, but there's only between a 20% to 80% chance it'll feel better once it's healed.
This pain I've had since November, the pain that's so godawful I can barely stand sometimes, making it difficult to walk, is no big deal to you?
Just ice it and take some anti-inflammatories, he advised, in all his sage wisdom.
So, basically do what hasn't been helping for the past two months. Yeah, that's awesome. Great. Thanks for that. And I just told you that hasn't been helping. That makes it that much better. You're not even hearing me, not even pretending to listen, even if you are theoretically working for me.
I hope there's a special area in the afterlife for doctors who don't care about people. He can take my knee pain and see how he enjoys it. Then I'll tell him, Oh, that's too, too bad... Wish I could help! And have a great day.
Being the patient, I'm totally impotent. The doctor has every bit of the power. He can say anything, do anything, care or not care, and he gets the exact same money. So, why bother to care? Push the patients through like it's an assembly line. Get that Porsche, that BMW, that huge house. After all, he's not technically violating the hypocratic oath, is he? By doing nothing, he's not necessarily doing harm. At least not directly.
It's the same with anyone who has power. Absolute power corrupts, etc. And it's not as though I have cancer or anything. God forbid. I only have horrible, ongoing pain that seems to respond to nothing, save rest. But being told, Gee, I'm not sure what I can do for you, but we'll try this... isn't exactly the most reassuring advice in the world. Especially when it's delivered by a doctor who could hardly care less.
So, where does that leave me? Scheduling surgery, I suppose, around my work schedule. Whenever it's convenient for them. Taking a week off to rest and recuperate, and hoping I'm in the 80% rather than the 20% range.
So comforting. Good thing I went.